Are you new to the SANE Forums for Carers?

[CherryBomb]

Are you new to the Forums?

If you’re new to the SANE Forums, and not sure where to start then read on to get some to find some tips about how you get the most out of participating on SANE Forums.

Writing your first post:

• It’s useful to write a short post, about 200 – 300 words, or anything up to 1 – 4 paragraphs. We’ve noticed that posts longer posts do not tend to get as many replies.
• State what you’re looking for. It’s helpful for other members to know how they can respond or if they can help. If you need advice about a particular issue, ensure that you ask a question (or several). Or if you just want to share thoughts, it can be helpful to express this.

Deciding whether to start a new discussion, or write a post

• Starting a new discussion means starting a new conversation where no one else has commented. It’s literally like striking up a new conversation. Writing a post means contributing to an already existing discussion, where others are already ‘chatting.’
• Before starting a new discussion, we recommend looking through the Forums to find others who might be talking about a similar issue that you want to chat about. This way you may find that there’s another member, or an established discussion, where there is wealth of knowledge with members talking about exactly the same topic that you are interested in. Remember, it’s ok to contribute to an established discussion. Many members welcome it.

Looking relevant discussions

• You are able to search for discussions by using the search bar (see image below). Just type in words that are relevant to your search.

 

• You can also search for topics by using our filter. Just click on one of the discussions, on the next page, select ‘show filter (displayed in image), and this will expand to give you a list of topics. Click on the relevant topic.

 

Community Guidelines:

• These are the ‘in’ and ‘outs’ of the SANE Community, which exist to keep people safe. They’re fairly straight forward, and basically ask that we treat everyone with respect. Though, we do recommend that you read them just to clarify what’s ok. Don’t worry if you make a mistake (many members do!) and write something in a post that’s not up to our guideline’s standards. When this happens one of our lovely moderators will contact you via email to let you know what guideline in your post needs to be worked on, and they will explain why that particular guideline exists. Usually, you’ll be asked to edit your post so that it meets the guidelines. Once this happens your post will be published.

When things get tough

• See this thread for tips and advice for when things get tough on the Forums. It contains some strategies about what you can do if you find that you’re feeling bothered by a particular post, or posts written by a particular member.

Online events

We host a few online events on the Forums, which everyone is invited to:

• The Weekly Friday Feast: Is an opportunity just to mingle with other members. Bring along a virtual plate of food and enjoy people’s company. It usually starts around 6pm AEST. Its in the Lived Experiences Forums but carers can go along too.
• Topic Tuesday: Keep an eye in our 'Special Events' area. Once a month, we have a lively discussion about a topical issue. Sometimes we have a guest speaker, or we host an in-house styled conversation between our peers to address an issue of interest. Watch this space as we’re looking at increasing the amount of Topic Tuesdays in 2016!
• Ask Anything Monday: We call for members email any questions that they are reluctant to post on the Forums. We post these on Mondays so that members of the community can respond.

Moderation

• The Forums are moderated 24/7 by a health professional who reviews every post. However, if you find a post that concerns you, please contact our moderation team: team@saneforums.org or select the ‘report inappropriate content’ function that is available on every post, which will prompt one of our moderators to review that post.

[PeppiPatty]

Sometimes, if things are too hard, I write a message just saying Im really overwhelmed. Often it's the responces that you read after a while that are so uplifting.....

[Achillies]

Hi there,not sure if this message will reach you as i find using the forum a bit difficult to find the right places to write at times(maybe its cos i use it on iphone i dont know,maybe its because im not very computer savvy).Dont be too hard on yourself when you sometimes feel its all a bit too hard.we all sometimes feel that way.just think of your emotions like a wave,it goes up sometimes and will also go down sometimes neither which you can control completely,just "go with the flow" always remembering when things are down its only a matter of time before they will again go up,its inevitable! If life was always completely "flat" it would be pretty boring:) Take care of yourself and your daughter,it sounds like your all shes got and she may not always show how much she appreciates you but im SURE she does.she may be frustrated at herself for having a mental illness and doesnt always know how to express herself.I really feel for both of you.Life can really deal us a tough hand sometimes but you need to play the best you can with the cards youve got! Just a question,are there any other factors causing her to get so upset? would a change of environment help her(ie:if living in a hectic city that may be stressfull and perhaps a quiet country town would be more calming? Does she have any friends to help her during tough times? do you have friends to help you? Dont be afraid to reach out for help,if you dont get the reception you want from a helper just keep looking until you and your daughter find someone who works for you.Hope my humble advice has helped a but.Theres not really any one fix type answer in situations like this hey,stay positive.regards Achillies:)

[PeppiPatty]

Hi 

@Achillies . Your message is very kind. My name is PeppiPAtty,

Im usually found on a few threads on Lived experience and Carers....

 nightshift thread  

welcome WEdnesday

Friday night feast.  @Achillies ...you write; 

I really feel for both of you.Life can really deal us a tough hand sometimes but you need to play the best you can with the cards youve got! Just a question,are there any other factors causing her to get so upset? would a change of environment help her(ie:if living in a hectic city that may be stressfull and perhaps a quiet country town would be more calming? Does she have any friends to help her during tough times? do you have friends to help you? Dont be afraid to reach out for help,if you dont get the reception you want from a helper just keep looking until you and your daughter find someone who works for you.Hope my humble advice has helped a but.Theres not really any one fix type answer in situations like this hey,stay positive

And I agree agree. When you wrote the

"Change of Environment......her friends.....reaching out for help.......keep looking........

Ille get back to you when Ive read the original message because Im just caring for my  son at 21 and my husband. Your message has helped me out today for me 

PP

[PUP]

Hello, I live alone with my mum who has bipolar and my friend's mum thinks chatting with you might help. I'm in my room on the mobile and mums watching tv like usual. I have a big brother at uni in the city, he doesn't visit much but we talk & email.
I want to know what to do for mum, its like I'm invisible some days. She sleeps a lot & crying a lot lately. I wonder if its me so i lay low, but miss her. Prefer her highs when she talks fast, keeps house better & we go out more. My dad committed suicide 2011, he use to hear voices & did weird stuff. I worry i might get sick too. My brother got bad depression after dad died but mum took him to lots of counseling and he got better. Why doesn't mum get better? I want to leave home one day but that might make her more sad. Any advise would help thank you.

[Achillies]

Hi i must start by saying that you cannot blame yourself for your mums illness nor your late fathers suicide.Its NOT your fault! Does your mum take medication for her bipolar or does she sometimes skip it? she may need some professional assistance to help her with her emotions.If your feeling stressed or depressed id recommend finding someone to talk to about your feelings.Its sad what happened with your father but that was his decision and nobody elses.I know this may sound harsh but you need to think of your own state of mind first and foremost as if you let lifes difficulties get to you too much then you wont be much help to your mum,yourself or anyone! You got one chance in life,dont spend it always worrying about things you cant change.As bad as life can get believe it or not theres someone else who has it worse.Just focus on the positives,they may be hard to find sometimes but theyre there if you look hard enough:) Do you work or study? Im a fulltime carer for my partner who has a brain injury.I have learned so much from being a carer and i love it,it gives me a purpose:) You need to find something in your life that gives you a feeling of purpose and i personally believe giving back to others less fortunate is really good for not only the people you help but also for you! Maybe volunteering? If you dont try it you will never know the rewards! Good luck,keep you chin up! You gotta be tough in this world mate as life can sure be pretty damn cruel but keep fighting on and im sure one day you will be ok:)

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @PUP

Wow, you have come through a lot in your life already, and you are doing so well to be able to talk about your situation and experiences as clearly as you have.  

Thanks for sharing, it's important for your own well-being to chat with others who understand and can help you.

The sort of details you have provided are exactly what can be supported, some of it a little at a time, but you also qualify as a carer because you are helping to support someone else.

Here is some information made available elsewhere on the site tonight for carer support, by @-karma- :

http://www.carersvictoria.org.au/about-us

Freecall 1800 242 636

'Carers provide care and support to family members and friends who have a disability, mental illness, chronic condition, terminal illness or who are frail aged.'

If you are not in Victoria, this site may direct you to services closer to your home, or you could ask @-karma- for more details.

Do you have friends you spend time with ?  Does anyone else spend time with your mum ?

Keep in touch.

[PeppiPatty]

Hi @PUP

Thinking about you,

PP