Hi @BlueBay
I am glad you stayed away from the nursing home today - you have other priorities and there is nothing but sadness for you there - your MIL doesn't know you and it is pretty horrible for you and your husband as well - but she's his mother - not yours - and I think she gives him a hard time regardless of how often he goes - it's a hard thing to deal with - I kow - I understand that - but I ask myself - what's the point when your husband doesn't support you -
There's nothing I can suggest actually - except tell you I didn't visit my mother for years because she was rude to me and I wasn't going to put up with that and I have learned to be assertive
And you can too - I could start a thread about being assertive because the first thing you learn is stuff like
Whose problem it is and what your rights are and of course - you practise - and you decided to care for yourself and not go to the nursing home today and that was assertive and I am proud that you took the initiative
It's really hard work being in a psyche hospital - I have had my turn though my treatment was different so long ago when the psychiatrist was the main person in my therapy - no psychologist at the time - and I was in analysis which is a huge commitment for the doctor and the patient - 3 x 1 hour a week for years - on medicare - and I am not sure if it helped or not but I think it did because I had short vists often - and it helped a lot being able to take breaks in hospital when things were so bad at home
It was very different but I was able to do assertiveness training at the groups and other things like communication
I am actually glad you are trying things without medication - and really glad you are in hospital while this is happening. Things are often so bad for you I wonder how much you have to go through before someone does something to make a difference rather than just keeping things going along the way you are when things are so rotten for you
There are things that need to be settled at home with Huffnpuff as well as dealing with your childhood abuse - possibly having things more settled at home would help put the past behind you which would be great - Huffnpuff really needs to sort his head out - if he can't see that then the only thing you can do is to be more assertive and not just put up with his aggression and pickiness -
It can be done - has anyone suggested working on being assertive - you don't need to be the assertive type - we just need to stick up for ourselves
I am going out with a helper tomorrow - I hope to get a chance to come in and post - I can always read my phone now it has been fixed but things have become busy for me since I went back to classes a few weeks ago - but I will catch up asap
All the best
Dec
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