Being misstreated

[Appleblossom]

Funny how we are all connected. Maybe little nods from one person to the next set a positive domino effect going for you guys.

My brothers:  one I was split from since he was 6 months.  I am his closest relative now, (apart from his children) but he has cancer and lives interstate and overseas. we have seen each other approximately once a year over last 20 years so that is almost normal I guess.  The other I was very close to, made mum jealous, but we were split for about 5 years when he was 4-9.  He died 20 years ago, now. I didnt realise it has been that long.

Your brother is an idiot if he doesnt get his act together to contact.

Web design.  I am trying to get over computer allergy, being old fart etc.

[Troubled_One]

Hey @Appleblossom  yeah I agree with you, I like your passion.

I think he knows he should get in touch, but he does not realise how serious it is.

What are your interests?

I can see your story, how long did you have with your brother?

Yeah, I bought a website name, just working on it atm. And yes computers I am not a fan of either atm, I get bad pannic attacks if i am at one for to long. 😞 🙂

[PeppiPatty]

clever   idea @Appleblossom

For @Troubled_One

Its a bit like joking around, isnt it?

Guess what you two.....i just came back from seeing my Psychotherapist. 

Why am i so lucky ? I see her for very little.did you know this is the 12th year since ive seen her. Ille write back later to say what happened. ......

[Appleblossom]

I had 4 years with brother before I left home. It was in the days of stamp collecting, lego trains and hot rods. We played a lot, very happily, went for walks down the creek together.  Wagged school and went fishing, once, together. He was a cheeky bugger and would take out fuses so we had to watch his choice of tv show.

After I left home, we rode motor bikes together.  He always had more dope than me because he was fastidious about the humidity and lights in his secret cupboard.  Amazing the way he was so handy without a dad to show him.  He fixed our appliances etc. I could never dob him in though I stopped using any drugs years before.

My mum had 5 uncles .. do you think one of them would have shown an interest in him, let alone me?

I also am a bit ticked off at the moment as I have not used drugs for 35 years but I still have to deal with BS because of it. Even one bad GP marked up my file against me cos I got hep when 20, and then another apologised for him.

It is taking a bit long to get a bit of respect.

Now I am turning things around, when self righteous people give me the pip I say "I could never become an alcoholic cos I was a druggie first".  I got hep cos I was dumb and let the one-armed man go first .. der .. we all know now what that means. But I was off it when my bully cousin pushed shit on my little brother. And I tried to stop the son of a nuclear physics lecturer forcing my sister to take LSD.

So much for which families or people get good labels and bad labels.

Its tough not having any one to protect you in a dog eat dog world.

I say listen and care, and dont drive your kids mad or to use dope. Now they are legalising the stuff anyway. Whatever. I'm over it.

They say live in the present. hmmm .. I'm trying.

Yeah its funny how computers arent real responsive to hammers, but they do respond to patient coaxing.

Thank you for letting me have a little teenage tantrum.

[PeppiPatty]

@Appleblossom

Honey, keep on writing. Let it out and it heals. Imagine yourself as a nurse, healing yourself, walki g down a hill to Paradise 

[Troubled_One]

Hey @Appleblossom  ok so that sounds like when you were young you did not get much time with your brother, and the other you did, but maybe that is confusing you?

I have had to deal with critisism for years being in and out of hospitals, you can read here Living with depression and anxiety and here about drug abuse Major drug abuse

I have not used drugs for about 7 years, and also had a bad knee injury from driving in to a telegraph pole when I was 21. And I hear you, I still feel like I am possibly labelled by not only my family but doctors as well. But I fight that like you. My knee is really bad and gives me big dramas, but I still believe in my self and my family.

I guess its just trying to get the balance we need to get things working.

Maybe @NikNik  can create a new thread for you, "dealing with being annoyed" or something like that?

Thanks for your help, anyways.

Lee.

[Appleblossom]

Thanks for reading. I read your other posts. Stay hopeful.

I am not sure if I am that confused, brutally sane or a deluded wishful thinker. Maybe I stick my neck out again, get my fingers burnt, mix all my metaphors and come up with some soupy love talk to deal with my despair.

I say my brother had BPD and the lady thinks I said my daughter had it, misunderstandings are rife, but we keep tryin' and there is good will here.

Will you tell us what is your website about .. without giving away your anonymity?

[Troubled_One]

Hey @Appleblossom  thanks for reading my stories. Yeah you do not seem to confused, perhaps like you said there some missundertsandings there and maybe we all wish we could turn around and fix that?

Which lady said your brother has BPD like a doctor? It is so hard to try and get people to understand things I am glad you read my stories the "SANE" forums are really one thing that has kept me going. And the people who have helped me on it you know who you are! 😄

My website... well it is kinda top secret lol i am not crazy just a idea that I bought the name of is all i wish to disclose hehe. But I do really like music

Not just heavy metal or techno all music, but I like to mix house music kinda like a DJ you like DJs?

[Appleblossom]

DJs can be great. I have fond memories of one who I met 35 years ago .. he loved soul. I went for a week to "the cross" (Sydney) when I was coming off drugs and danced and danced. I had lived there as a little kid and I went back to get away from St Kilda .. ha ha ha then I realised it was also a drug capital, I did not get stoned but had a good week right in the centre of things. I actually went to back home to St Kilda and played Bach like mad for a year and finished my year 12 at night school. By the end of all that I was truly over drugs and then went to uni etc.

Met exhusband on a garage recording when I was playing keys for a friends record ... back in the days of vinyl.. Mostly I am into world baroque, classical, choral and recorder music now.  I rarely listen to radio, CDs etc. Mostly I "do" music.  My son was into metal as a teenager, and a composer I knew from MSO gave me a few books of Metallica .. they were mainly Bass Guitar riffs so I spent a few months playing them on my piano ..  so I guess who can say I like all sorts of music too .. Poulenc's Stabat Mater is my next gig .. may not be your scene.

Hope you are doing ok

[PeppiPatty]

how are you, @Troubled_One?

I see you being supportive of others 🐃🐣🐭

I read your blog, golly, your a very good man. I had no idea.