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17 Dec 2015 12:47 AM
17 Dec 2015 12:47 AM
17 Dec 2015 01:23 AM
17 Dec 2015 01:23 AM
17 Dec 2015 01:54 AM
17 Dec 2015 01:54 AM
Hi @Former-Member
Yes isnt it great that people do stick up for each other.
Motherhood is exhausting and takes everything we have to give ... but the proud mum feeling makes it worth it. I could say today ... that I really like the man my son has become ... that I dont have the problems that most of the other mums complain about their adult sons ... the feedback isnt immediate ... but all the effort and consideration you put in does reap rewards.
Hope you get a good night sleep.
17 Dec 2015 07:50 AM
17 Dec 2015 07:50 AM
Hi @PeppiPatty,
Yes, it makes me so angry seeing how women continue to be treated, while these monster men go on with their lives, it is just not fair, they never seem to be punished for their crimes, or if they are it is embarrasingly inadequate.
All these men know is violence, so i think they should be treated like wise, and should have all their assets taken away to support the people they abuse, they should be the ones left with nothing, not the women.
Your son @PeppiPatty sounds like a wonderful man, what a heroic job to do, helping the vulnerable, i am so glad he reported that man, if he thinks like that, then he is not suited to the job he is in.
@PeppiPatty you are a wonderful person, i am so glad you are here on the forums.
Take care
Jacques
17 Dec 2015 11:51 AM
17 Dec 2015 11:51 AM
17 Dec 2015 07:01 PM
17 Dec 2015 07:01 PM
Thank you @PeppiPatty, i like the way you write too, very direct and caring.
I have never been in a relationship, so i really don't understand how they work, but if you get to the point of being abusive, to my way of thinking the relationship is over well before you get to that point.
I am glad the Stalker you had is leaving you alone bit by bit, just because he never hit you does not mean he didn't leave his mark, psychological Violence can be even more harmful than physical violence, the scares it leaves on our memories and our way of seeing people has lasting impacts. i have been tortured by a neighbour for over 7 years, i am who i am today because of the abuse i suffered.
I think what annoys me most is the abusers go on to have new relationships, go on with their lives while the victims are left to suffer and piece their lives back together. i would love to see where the abuser has all their assets taken from them and sold off to support their abused partner. a way for the perpetrator to feel a little of what they have done to their significant other.
One thing i have learned from experts and documentaries on domestic violence is men never feel guilty about what they have done, the pretend to feel sorry, but on the most part they continue to abuse future partners, the only thing i have found men respond to is violence and loss of assets.
I see men who abuse women as weak, impotent and of a lower class of human, i have noticed most abusers will not fight someone who can hit back, only the people who will not do anything back.
As i see it, nothing is going to change the way men think, politicians come out for their photo opportunity with domestic violence, but for the most part they really do nothing to keep women safe.
Men who abuse need to go on a perminant register so future partners can see if they are in danger, this is the only way to keep women safe.
17 Dec 2015 11:59 PM
17 Dec 2015 11:59 PM
18 Dec 2015 02:10 AM
18 Dec 2015 02:10 AM
18 Dec 2015 07:58 AM
18 Dec 2015 07:58 AM
Dear Anne,
Oh Anne, please don't put yourself down like that, i do not see you as simple, you are very learned, you read a lot and try to broaden your knowledge, to me that is smart. oh and you are very kind 😄
Yes i have read many books about how the purpetrators have had bad childhoods or they are Anxious or depressed, all the excuses.
I want to tell you a little story, my father was born 2 years after WWII in Germany, his first 18 years where hell, he spent his first day of birth with his mother, the second day he spent at the coal mines because she was forced by the British to go back to work digging coal, by the time he was 7 he was in a boys home because of family disputes, he had a terrible life, but he was the most kindest gentest person, never once yelling at my mother or ever abusing her.
that is one story, mine is one of very little affection, my parents made sure i had every thing i could ever want, but because the both of them came from very strickt households they showed me little affection, i don't think i am abusive or agressive towards women?
What i am trying to say is we are who we want to be, nurture does play a part, but that is why we have a little thing called a brain, we can think for ourselves, we know right from wrong, yes i SH which i know is anger turned inwards, but that affects no one but me.
I know reading about relationships they are very complex, and i have struggled to understand why women go back after being abused or why they don't leave in the first signes of abuse, i have never been in a relationship so i would never judge, i just don't understand that is all.
Anne yo uare a wise woman, please give yourself credit, the things you write about, the people you help with public housing i.e. letter writing, shows you are a very smart lady.
Oh Please give Mr Arlo a cuddle for me 😄
Take care my friend
Jacques
18 Dec 2015 11:36 AM
18 Dec 2015 11:36 AM
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