Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

Also, it has nothing to do with chasing an ideal body. An ideal body doesn't exist. 

[soft_edges]

Hey @Former-Member, it feels as though my responses have been quite unhelpful for you. I was drawn to your post because I feel empathy for you as a trans person, but I know that our experiences differ greatly. I'm sorry if I've said anything that has felt invalidating or like I'm not trying to understand you. I really hope you can find the support you need.

[Former-Member]

@soft_edges  I'm used to it, and its fine. I should just learn to keep my mouth shut like I have for decades. 

[Former-Member]

I'm glad you seem to have found peace or whatever it is you were needing with your body, and that you seem to have connection with the trans community @soft_edges  

Its obvious I probably never will, so I just have to "live" with that, or give the impression I am so called alive. I'm wondering if you found the past hospitalisations helpful at all? As I wrote, I didn't but I guess your experience will probably differ. In fact, that is where a lot of medical trauma happened for me and most times they refused to even give me an actual bed. I just got stared at and ignored and nothing has changed since my last one almost 6 years ago. 

Its just a matter of the system doesn't give a sh*t, and I often wonder why they should when mental healthcare clearly does nothing in the end. 

[soft_edges]

@Former-Member, I don't think you should keep your mouth shut, you've obviously suffered some horrible injustices that need to be spoken, particularly your experience of hospitalisation from what you say sounds traumatising.

[Former-Member]

I guess.

[Former-Member]

I guess @soft_edges 

[Former-Member]

I've just kept looking over this for the past week and it disappoints me how much it serves as a reminder for why I keep my mouth shut, and is a huge reminder of all the times I've been attacked, bullied and excluded within a so called inclusive community. It really shows how lacking understanding and services are, and just goes to show that you can be alienated by anyone, even other people in the "community". 

I will continue to keep my mouth shut and it doesn't surprise me no one else has replied. I won't be coming back here again and will be blocking the website as it seems all my attempts to communicate failed. Which is fine, but there's no point in coming here because of it. 

[soft_edges]

Hey @Former-Member, I’m really sorry to hear this has been your experience of these forums, and particularly our interactions. I’ve honestly tried my best to be supportive and provide my own suggestions for coping strategies as you were asking, and just being here to listen and ask questions. I don’t understand what I’ve done that you’ve felt alienated by, I’ve really just wanted to offer my support, and the offer still stands.

This is pretty small community from what I’ve seen, so I was even surprised to see another post from a trans person, which might be why you haven’t heard from anyone else. I really hope you find the support you’re looking for.