Living with Ourselves

[Owlunar]

I really like this picture and the comment @Sophia1@Zoe7@outlander@Maggie@Adge

etc

It's horrible when someone goes around spreading their ill-will and yes - it is because they got up on the wrong side of the bed and that can be such a toxic thing to share with other people

How do we deal with that?

mmmm - yes - we can refuse to inhale their ill-feeling and hope they will inhale our calm - I get it - but that can be so hard to do

I feel myself that instead of retaliating I need to get out into the fresh air when I am near someone filling the immediated environment with the dark shadow of their own misery and who knows - they may be entitled to feel that way

If we can spread our calm and peace  out from our centre - if only we are able - then we help not just ourselves but everyone in the crowd who may be feeling tired and fed up - that is such a good thing to do - I wish I was better at it but we can only do our best

But it's a best worth doing

Dec

[Owlunar]

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@Zoe7 wrote:

I agree with everything you wrote @Sophia1 

I do get annoyed when people talk at others though and don't actually listen themselves - both listening and respect are essential in any 2 way conversation.

I tend to be more of a listening and only add something to the conversation if I actually have something to say - I think that is why I find it hard on here sometimes too - 'small talk' and talking for the sake of it are not things I enjoy at all. I am happy with silence and often find that more uplifting than talking.

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I agree with so much that you have said here @Zoe7 - I find small-talk pretty annoying too - I enjoy the silence - I learn more about life in the silence

Dec

[Sophia1]

@Zoe7

actualy I believe that having a conversation with a person or people in real life is different to writing a response on here..

facial expressions...tones of voice...body language etc

Having said that we all write differently as well..

I am a listener too although I do ask the person about themselves more than talk about myself....

There are those people who can talk under water.. 

I do not struggle with confidence...I do get bored and hide my frustration with people who consistently veer the conversation back to themselves........

I also loathe gossip...

[Sophia1]

just letting all who visit and share on here...

I am worn out and drained and exhausted...

I have written in more detail on sharing the wisdom within thread...

situation with my "family member" has worsened to the extent that is now untenable...

this in itself is causing me great distress as I love him so much...

I am having a break from here for a while...have no idea how long..or how short for that matter..

I just want to stop my thinking...quieten my mind in the now

thanking you in advance whoever responds..

[Zoe7]

Take all the time or as little time as youo need @Sophia1 I will read what you have written on the other thread too to get a better idea of what you are dealing with.

I personally hope you are back sooner rather than later and we will embrace you as always for you intellect, wisdom and compassion and the true care we have for you.

I hope you find a way to deal with what is going on for you and do not be afraid to reach out here if you need - we are just a tag away to support you Hon.

Sending you love and hugs and hoping you find some peace in your life 

[Former-Member]

Hi @Sophia1.  I am so sorry to hear things have worsened.  A break from here may be a good idea.  Of course you know you can always come back if you need to vent, or need the understanding and support of your friends here.

I will miss your presence, but totally understand your reasons for retreating.  I hope things resolve better than your expect.

Sending kindest thoughts your way.  Allow your tired, worn out and exhausted self a chance to rest and recover.

Sherry 

[Sophia1]

Hello @Former-Member@Maggie@outlander@Owlunar@eudemonism@eth@Mazarita@Exoplanet@CheerBear@Former-Member@Shaz51@Zoe7@Adge@Teej@Bunniekins@saturnzoon@TAB@NatalieS@Appleblossom

as well as anyone else with whom I shared support

You have all at some stage offered me kind words and thanked me for my responding to you..

I do not wish to drag you over to this thread...take you away from your places where you feel safe..

I do need to look after myself at present though..this is the easiest way for me to do this..

I have taken time off and am slowly reappearing so to speak..

I will only write on this thread for now  ..another form of self care for now

I feel overwhelmed trying to keep up with the busy threads and this is defeating the whole purpose of me being on the forums...

In saying all of this I am also aware that you all have your own struggles...

I want you to know that I still think of you and support you ...I also feel comforted knowing that you all have support of others too...

this is true care...

if you would like to write to me please do so on this thread for the time being..thank you for understanding..even a click on the support suffices..

In writing that last sentence I recognised that the first thought that came into my mind was how selfish I was being...

This is part of my old negative patterned thinking...actually very much a part of how I have treated myself for most of my life...putting everyone else first...to the extent of not even thinking of myself full stop..

so now I am working on "I am not being selfish...I am looking after self..

take care all ...

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1 that's fine, no need to worry about that, we all have our own battles to fight...

With myself, it's often s lack of motivation and low moods... it's caused by feeling overwhelmed and stressed by things i can't control ... i basically feel i don't have the energy to contend with everything that's going on 'out there / in my mind '

My regular thoughts that i hardly ever act on, are still there, and are still strong... example... walking the dog, finding a quiet place to spend a few hours fishing, visiting and socialising ecetra... but low motivation levels, low mood and contending with side effects / underlying illness mean it hardly ever happens...

Who do i blame? The professionals...

What's my answer... more or less meds...

I'm tired of being on the fence...

Eude

[Exoplanet]

@Sophia1

I just want you to know I had just posted on the Rave, tagging you on that post - before I read this one. I'm fine with chatting here with you, it's another 'safe' place for me  The main reason I tag you on the Rave is so you can read my sometimes babbeling blurbs 😄 I don't expect you to answer there or at all if your not up to it  You don't drag me anywhere - I willingly come, because I enjoy conversation with you 

Your absolutely right, you are not being selfish, quite the opposite - you need to look after you first so you can then look after others. I know looking after others is what's important to you  

Lots of love to you Sophia 

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1 plus, my cigarette use is at the centre of each moment and each day...

I've got a dozen or so options that are always beckoning at myself to utilise, but i genuinely think, stuff it, it's all to hard, it's all to overwhelming. And go for the easier / harder option of doing nothing...

Eude