Living with Ourselves

[Maggie]

@Sophia1  Building a new home sounds like it comes with some huge challenges.

Dust, dirt, cat tunnels etc. that’s a lot to think about, and do, especially with poor health.

I have finally landed a permanent home. I have a one bedroom housing flat, so very affordable on a pension. Still a few things to do inside and out, but it feels good. The area and neighbors are safe and quiet.

My garden. I don’t have too much to worry about, just two small areas out the back, and two out the front. One of the back areas is shady, so I have some native plants there. They are starting to flower, so successful. The other area in the back is full of potato’s. ( I’m Irish). Love my spuds.

the front area is full of pansies, spinach, silver beet, lettuce and soon, tomato’s.

The other area in trying to tidy. It has the bottle brush tree. It’s been over taken by three vines and some ivy. That’s a work in progress. I don’t think I can plant there, it’s been sprayed with stuff, but I’ll save the tree.

I hope your cat is doing ok. My baby is a beautiful as ever.

I have become addicted to painting mandala s on stones and canvas @Sophia1 😂😂😂. Paint everywhere.

Sending you lots of. 💕💕💕💕

[Adge]

Hi @Sophia1 Thanks so much.

Sorry I'm not able to reply with anything that does your consideration justice.

I'm in severe overwhelm - which virtually disables my typing skills & thinking capacity (to reply).

Also makes it exceedingly difficult to act out of Self-Preservation - To turn around & say No to Job offer, after having said Yes.

So sorry to hear about your missing family member - that sounds very stressful & worrying.

My brothers (4 of them), have not responded to any contact (sms or phone calls) from me - for over 6 months.

So I feel effectively cut off.

Yes I would be able to manage small odd jobs & small gardening jobs.

I have applied for some positions like that - yet I'm only considered or Interviewed for Disability & Aged Care Support jobs.

Once I start back in that - I will feel stuck & unable to get out (again) - like for the past 4 years, in a highly stressful, low-paid, very irregular hours position.

Yes very difficult to relax or sleep - with mind going at 90 miles an hour.

I get that.

Mine is doing that right now...

I hope you did get some good sleep.

Adge

Adge

[Sophia1]

Oh dear @Maggie 

I am so happy for you that you too have found your forever home.

It sounds perfect.

Your garden plantings sound delightful and mandela stones and canvas.

I am intrigued.

I am trying to bring out the creativity in me.

All I am achieving at the moment is hoarding in our second bedroom.

I finally got my bookcase and books out of storage. 

Wow what a feeling that was. I was like a little girl finding herself in a very old dusty bookshop.

I have also been given some wonderful art books as well as poetry.

So have much to lose myself in when I am more settled.

The disarray outside with dirt being shuffled here there and everywhere is doing my head in.

My husband works very hard, has some wonderful ideas for projects that he creates my his head.

He leaves tools lying everywhere which does my head in.

We also have several unfinished projects inside. I probably have already mentioned that.

I must not complain or moan. 

I just long for calm.

I have my park, river and reserve to walk through.

I have been isolating again though due to family member decline.

I shall bounce back eventually.

I am just not being hard on myself.

Irish,

Now there's a thing.

I have ancestry from Ireland.

Was on my list to visit. 

Don't see myself going out of the country now with covid.

you must tell me more about your native plants in the shade.

love Sophia 💚

[Sophia1]

Hello @Adge 

Feeling zapped of energy is definitely a message from your body to slow down and be kind to yourself.

This is not a slur on you in the least.

Your body is your friend and is reminding you to take care of it.

Listen to the expert. Here I go again.

I have so many different strategies and alternate.

Night medication did allow me to sleep eventually last night.

I need to be off now.

I certainly am not helping myself by being on the computer either.

I just wanted to catch up with so many who have welcomed me back.

A nice feeling.

You are one of those people Adge.

Keep on leaving flyers or notices on boards with your abilities and contact number.

When you have more energy, perhaps you can ask for suggestions from some of the creative folk on here.

I can think of a few people who would come up with some very interesting suggestions and who have great techno skills.

Something to put on the back burner for now.

Sleep tight.

Your friend

Sophia 💚

[Sophia1]

Hello @Maggie @Adge @outlander @Emelia8 @Powderfinger @Anastasia @Clawde @Exoplanet @MDT @TAB @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @eth 

No huge essay today.

Read somewhere that someone had stated that they were feeling rather depleted.

Ditto to that.

Family member situation declined and have spent the better part of 3 days on the phone chasing around the country.

It is what it is and whilst I accept that, I will never let go. At the same time respecting human rights.

So on a brighter note......

What strategies, efforts, thoughts, ideas, fleeting feelings are you using to get through?

I have started drinking cocoa and chilli tea.. It is close to my love of dark chocolate..No competition though.

Sophia 

💚🙃

[MDT]

I found a cool quote today @Sophia1

Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.

[MDT]

Its from Seneca

[Appleblossom]

I popped into a friend's today and lovely lemon verbena tea. Also made every point of sale moment a moment of laughter, and only had to pay at one ... cos only bought at one ... feeling for the stresses in retail with the lockdown over> They seem run off their feet.

Hugs @Sophia1 Sounds tough.

[outlander]

Hello @Sophia1 i dont really have a thread on the carers side. Occassionally i post to others on thr carers under 30 but not regularly there. You dont have to tread carefully, you can talk about anything at anytime you like including asking questions 🌻

[Exoplanet]

Hello @Sophia1 ,
Great to hear from you, sorry to hear your feeling depleted.
My family situation had a better moment & yet my heads not
doing very well with it.
I've got car problems, they've been getting worse for a while. I
think I'll have to go to the bank & see if I can get a loan as the
repairs are in the thousands & I feel I'd just be throwing good
money after bad. I don't have the money for that, I gave so
much to the family member.
I had let go, I had never stopped loving, but in letting go I had
found some peace. The better moment was really quite flat, no
remorse, no gratitude, but I did get a 'love you' & considering
I may only have a couple/few years, that made the day worth it.
It would have been sad to end without it.
I guess my strategies include the efforts, thoughts & ideas I
have about my camping trips, which do give me fleeting
feelings of positivity; the joy of fear, as I put excitement, the
feeling of accomplishment for just getting out my front door
& serenity whilst gazing upon nature.
Love to you