Well, my relaxing day kind of got shot to the $hithouse.  Got some shopping done, the hardest present is always the Wishing Tree gift I buy for my 9yo son that I lost in a car accident 12 years ago.  I always want to buy the perfect gift.  Today my mums dementia was a bit of a battle and she was very grumpy all day, it just made me angry and upset - not at her, just at the dementia and the unfairness of it all.  I feel like I’ve rushed the purchase, I just feel $hit about the whole thing.

By the time I got to my hair appointment I had totally lost all my resolve, I was terribly uncomfortable having anyone touch me and I just wanted it to be over.    I’m sitting here now feeling like my skin is full of prickles, I want to cry my eyes out - I just feel like €rap.

The worst part is that mum got stuborn and decided to sit in the car most of the afternoon so hubby went into shops while I sat in the car with her.  Now I have to go back in the next few days and finish the gift shopping.  It’s just all too hard, it shouldnt have to be this hard