Thank you for at least being here with me in the virtual world @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope. I keep getting giant waves of panic about how alone I am in the real world. I feel so confused and so scared. (A) went on and on, on Monday about how much she CAN'T be there for me. I am so confused. Every friend I've ever had (and who consequently went away) told me at one point or another that what I was looking for/needing wasn't friend stuff and that I needed professional help. But then all the professionals (including A) seem to shame and criticise me for trying to get friend stuff from them. So...friends say I need professional help and professionals say I need friend help...and consequently I am utterly alone. I am so glad you are there. I am particularly glad that @Former-Member has made it onto my safe touching list. I will try and snuggle into your hug and try to feel safe @Former-Member.