@outlanderit is hard to help people with just words sometimes and I guess that is the risk we take with being on here. All we can do is try. But at the end of the day people have to want to help themselves.
I really do not know how you do everything that you do. Something has to give hun, and you need to put yourself and you physical and mental health first.
Sorry you are feeling overwhelmed. I believe you have too much responsibility on your shoulders. I also know how hard it is to just shift it elsewhere. Explaining to your sisters that you love them but cant take as much care all the time, might encourage them to grow and mature a little.
You are such a bright helpful presence in the forum.
Take plenty of care of you.
sorry @Snowie i ended up with a nose bleed- usually i only get those in dry humid heats its not hot here so not sure. then ended up just having a shower to calm abit.
i guess your right with the risk we take with others here, it just gets hard sometimes that you cna be helping but sometimes it feels like words mean nothing too.
oh you also asked somewhere about the social group.... i think ill go next week and then maybe call it quits. im there 2 and abit hrs and i barely say one word there. my presence doesnt feel welcome. the convos out of the entire 5 hrs total are the ones ive told you about last time and on tuesday this time i was asked 2 different questions. one was did you enjoy yoga- i answered it was ok but not for me and before i could even ask them anything it was oh thats ok and walked away. i was left standing in either the kitchen or their 'hall' by myself half the time. only 4 were there this time and it split the original group apart so basically they were singles but it didnt help. i tried to iniciate a convo on a topic brought up the topic was changed before i even had a chance to say anything. and when someone was describing there neck injury i listened and said that must be awful and can relate abit to what your saying from an experience i had. they said oh thats a shame and walked away. so basically the entire time im there i am either left out, made to feel akward and i just dont say anything else and just give a small polite smile as a response twhen people look at me. i dont know what else to do really. some of the sessions i think could i could benefit from on a lifestyle perspective like budgeting but i think other than that i prob wont go and im good at my finances anyway.
ive worked out the best i can with the second job, its extra cash in hand so i can save to do another course plus fix my car without having heaps of pressures to go with it. being a carer has always had pressures but i cant really do a heap about those, and sisters i usually only have of a morning and yet again tomorrow morning i go over to their house and help out and take them to school. and usually one day of a weekend. its so hard in the mornings to get up and get motivated. its like ive just nodded off and its time to get up and drive and run around again. the afternoons have become abit easier as i dont really watch them then
i feel like this..
pretty pic, thank you @Appleblossom did you find the birding course interesting? the bird in your pic looks abit like a honeysuckle bird....
its is really hard tos hift it anywhere and trying to do therapy and gps and pdocs and coming off medications and changing new ones. its frustrating. i have been meaning to go for another blood test. i got sent away from the last one from collapsed veins and to come back after ive rested and hyrdrated again but i havent been back. another 3 weeks and ill have to get another one done anyway. makes me sick.
i dont know how else to shift anything anywhere and i am trying- or so i think anyway- to make a better life, to reduce stress but it doesnt seem to be working. hopefully something gives soon
thank you for stopping in too since i know things have been abit rough for you too
yeah i guess so @Snowie it just feels like another fail at life. its not helping my mh so i think after the craft session next week im done. ive paid up till then but its not really a young womens group nor is it that welcoming either.
thanks for saying i was helping
so i guess for now i can sit here in my little comfort zone and be with you guys until i can expand out again and gain some control over myself
am very drained from today and conversations with little people and others. Have taken meds early so am logging off for the night.
I hope you get some sleep tonight and have a good/ok/okish night.
Goognight my two very specials sis, always sitting with you two