Life

[Appleblossom]

Dont worry about posting here, @Former-Member unless it helps. 

It would be great if you can hold it together throughout the christmas period.  Thats why I though the idea of preparing to meet the challenges a good idea, part of that is making little decisions.  A bit of forethought can help.  Though stuff happens that we dont plan.  One Christmas Eve I took my son along a beach boulevard where the locals tried to outdo each other with their light displays.  It can be fun and bond the 3 of you together rather than worrying about what others are doing ... heaps will be doing it tough.. but they are a bit youn to know about that yet ... I was just thinking of people carrying on in the park ... when I mentioned that.

Detach from ex ... expect the worst but dont let it undo you ... just cut off from him and deal with situations only as they arise ... dont worry before anything happens.

I can understand retreating .. I often need to cocoon myself from the world ... and you certainly have a right to do only what you need to do for you and kids ... that is all.

I would really like you to be around here on christmas ... for me ... but thats me being greedy.

[Former-Member]

Thank you Appleblossom I can't tell you how much that means to me, I will b around on Christmas Day

[Jacques]

Stay strong @Former-Member this time of the year is extra tough, small things help us through. Maybe Dream of something small to do Christmas day, something to look forward too.

Thinking of you my friend

Jacques

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Jacques it means a lot to me that you've written to me here as I kno that it's scary for you. I'm proud of you for going to your appointment today too, I hope you are able to sleep soon.
I hope that your Christmas is ok - I'm glad you are here

[Former-Member]

Dear @PeppiPatty thank you for thinking of me and writing that in other places it helps to not feel so invisible to the world. I hope you are going ok and littkebuddah too

[PeppiPatty]

Dear @Former-Member

You must feel invisible but your not to me. You help so many people here online. 

Are you feeling nice today? 

I better go, have upped my work a little,

Anne xxx

[Former-Member]

Im stressed and not coping and I don't want to see anyone but the worker concerned and keeps asking me to make a plan for getting well and I don't know what that is I don't know how to be well I'm trying so hard to do all the right things for the kids but I feel numb and slow and I can't hear what people are saying to me and when I hear it doesn't make sense for a bit and it's scaring me but I'm scared to tell them that and I'm lost somewhere inside

[Jacques]

Please @Former-Member, call lifeline, i think things are comming to a head, you are really struggling, i know how bad the snow ball effect is, you are going through severe anxiety, i get it too, not understanding what people are saying, and feeling numb, i get the numb thing so often, i know it is scary, but it does pass.

You do need to tell someone @Former-Member, i know it is hard, and i know you are terrified of losing the children, but your safety is so important.

i will offer any support i can @Former-Member, i know all to well what you are going through. 

Try to slow things down, step outside and take some deep breaths, listen to soothing music, whatever you do try not to sit and think, this makes things so much worse.  keep busy.

Be safe, Take care my friend

Jacques

[NikNik]

hi @Former-Member

I'm sorry to hear you feel like you're not coping.
I think you're doing considerably well, under the circumstances, so please don't be too tough on yourself.

As Jacques said, it's important to call Lifeline (13 11 14) or Suicide call back (1300 659 467) if you feel like things are escalating for you.

If you feel up to it, it might be worth trying some grounding techniques (using your senses if that works for you) or some mindfulness techniques. This may help slow down the overwhelm going on at the moment.

I find the app 'Smiling Minds' really helpful. It's guided mindfulness exercises. Have you used them before?

[Former-Member]

Thanku Jacques and niknik i am doing the grounding and I have smiling minds but I haven't used it much I might try it later I got the actcompanion app that has good grounding I. It I use that when Jacques said about stuff before. I'm just not sure this struggle is ever going to end and I'm so tired