Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

@Adge - what a rude introduction back to work! Frankly, out of principle.

My suggestion to you is simple, out of principle - DONT GO IN & DONT FEEL GUILT. Ring, tx or send an email apology that you are unable to attend due to such late notice and immovable prior committments. Keep a copy of email as your written evidence in your work diary, close it & walk away emotionally. They'll learn!

 It will take practise, as people don't respond well to us taking back ground that belongs to us, making positive changes, healing... Too bad, you have every right! Send a strong message and don't go in! Explain you understand the need for mandatory training but will need adequate prior notice. They know this stuff and don't have a leg to stand on. Never take it personally! But ifcyou cave and go in - I totally understand that too - just remember whatever you do was YOUR decision 🌷🌿

Found this interesting write up in the likelihood you're laying awake stewing about work and need a read. Hugzz to you 💜🐦

[Former-Member]

https://journeyjottings.com/blog/2015/02/mondayitis-when-the-holiday-is-over/
@Adge

[Bubbles3]

if i wastnt here

people would forget about me

they wouldnt mention me

i am here and they still forget about me

the end

[Adge]

Well I didn't go to the training day (session) - although I meant to, & tried to force myself out the door (to go).

I just felt too ill to even attempt it.

The sinus infection (& chest fluid) has come back (since Saturday) - after feeling recovered for (only) less than 2 weeks.

I didn't communicate well (at all) that I wasn't going - works thought that I was going to be there, for at least half (3.5 hours) of it...

I'm usually much clearer in my communications (& explaining things). I'm afraid that I've stuffed up (a bit) this time - I wish I hadn't (guilt & shame)...

Adge

[Former-Member]

Oh well @Adge, tell them you took I'll suddenly, go see Dr for backup med/cert. You might have to consider sickness benefits a while to get better. Definitely stop beating yourself up. Feel for you. Hope a good sleep helps a little tonight 💜🐦💜🐦💜

[Former-Member]

I don't know what to do
All options have a downside
Future scenarios unpredictable
Present moment is all we have
Wish I could trust legals, tradies, and people in general for integrity, but it really is a case of - everything costs, everything!

[Former-Member]

I worry that I am always going to feel this lonely, this socially inept, this broken, this sad. I’m scared I will spend the rest of my life alone because no one will ever be able to accept me and love me the way I am—not even as a friend. I’m scared that I won’t be able to hang in there and that I will hurt people by leaving—even though they show no concern or care for me while I’m still here. And if I do manage to stick around, I’m terrified the next 38 years will be just as hard, if not harder. It doesn’t ever get better or easier. I am so tired. I’m scared I will always be this pathetic. 

[Former-Member]

😞

[Maggie]

It's unbearable for me to see the pain another member is going through because of me. Though I don't understand what went wrong, something did and I'm involved. My true heart just wanted to reach out and help yet I've achieved the exact opposit. Sorry doesn't cut it. I just want to say thank to you all for allowing me to be part of your community for this short time. The best thing I can do is leave, hoping you can all return to your friendships and support.

[Former-Member]

Don't 'leave' @Maggie, just log out, take a few weeks break and start afresh later, if inclined. That emotional distance helps. We sometimes get too caught up in distant social media, I think the way you feel is life finding balance. I have always liked your posts. No I'll feelings here, but just like the 'real world' there are some who have really hurt me and blatently ignore me - but, somehow, accepting how they ate and working around it has really strengthened me, and helped me to take it to the real world relationships. People are fallible, me included. Life paths are interesting and how people react has very little to do with you / me - its them. I use to want to save everyone (how arrogant was I lol). Only this morning I got a random tx from a brother not spoken to me for months, its just said "the more people I meet, the more I like my dog" I just responded with "Hi, how are you" - clearly its not me (use to always think it was and get mortified, rejected and suck up trying to win approval......), but yep, thats a losing battle, the war is in them. To keep my heart right all I can think to to is pray for them and not let it poison me. Hang in there Maggie, you're a beautiful soul ❤❤❤