Being misstreated

[PeppiPatty]

Dear Lee,

I'm concerned about you. You have been working very hard about yourself.
A lot is expected of you

And you give support to others online.........your not even 35 years old.

I've got some good things to write to you about myself......I may am being offered a bigger home in an expensive area in Perth......but please message first how you are.

Would you think of calling Lifeline?

[CherryBomb]

Hi @Troubled_One

Thought I might just pop in here to say hang tight. You sound so trained. Don't forget to take some time out to care for you.

@PeppiPatty raised a good point about calling Lifeline, so I thought I'd include the link here.

Take care.

[PeppiPatty]

Dearest ,

How are you today?

I've been busy but you and people like...@Ellie and @Aenoran have been on the back of the back of my mind. Making seneciino ??

Yes, I'm now a new language making person making up a new word .....senseciino meaning sense.

Let me write what's been happening for me in the past 2 weeks and I've been mindful that I've:

Had to get up and do the work myself.
Stay thorough and centred.
Be secretive
Not care what others feel.

a few people are both giggling or wondering about my state of mind for'staying,' with this creep.

I first went to see my GP. Explained to her and she wrote a letter that I've tried:
Restraining order
Police
Community centre
Someone moving in with me to keep this person away but nothing worked to keep me safe.

the letter from the GP asked Public housing to get me a transfer ASAP. And that I have no emotional reserve left from the past 18 months of trying to get away for him.
I got letter from Community Centre to Public housing and hopefully letter from the police.

then the stalker walked into my home. He's here !! Apologising but there is an edge to his apologies it feels he cannot take total responsibility for his actions.and still blames me for his bad behaviour.

There was a twist.....this person stalking me quit drinking alcohol first time in 19 years and been clean from alcohol for 69 days and quit smoking synthetic maraunjahh. Loots more apologies. good behaviour for past two weeks.....still criticising but only late at night and getting less and less.

do I forgive him?


I don't. Yesterday. Someone called me about a transfer to a very god area so I'm hoping this can do something but at the moment, I am living my life. It very difficult because

I don't believe I should tolerate his past and sometimes abuse.
Have him in my home.

But there's nothing I can do. I feel like I'm a little girl again having to tolerate my parents bad behaviour but the difference is that I needed my mother to care for me and love me so I put up with it but I don't need this person.

If this move actually happens......I will cross that bridge when it comes to it but it will not be easy.
this stalker is very 'blame everyone not myself...'

What do you think?

[WombatBoots]

Dear @PeppiPatty

My heart and thoughts are with you during this very difficult time.

You've said it all in your post.

You know in your heart and mind what you need to do, stay strong and back yourself.

I hope so much you get the new place, my thoughts are with you for a speedy positive outcome.

Good luck

Wombat/Matt

[SimpleAsThis]

@PeppiPatty

After reading through your post and everyone's comments... I am very worried about you!

I don't know as much about you and your situation - so I'm wondering why you're so trapped.... Especially with this abusive person. Please take care of yourself....

[Troubled_One]

hey anne, i think you have a right to be concerned. after understanding you i realised that is something that is not happening between me and my family.

i hope you can get out of your situation.

@CherryBombthanks for the understanding and help with lifeline. I am seeing my mother and father tomorrow again and i think this may be the only way to sort this out.

[PeppiPatty]

Dear @WombatBoots

Wow, thanks for your message......
It's been a rocky road. We started a relationship quickly after I left my darling husband. I feel now, thinking back that I was just really vulnerable. but, I kept on leaving, calling the police...............
But he won't go.
the very difficult thing is that I do not feel safe enough to say......leave me alone, live your life elsewhere. Every time I have done this in the past, he comes back.

I just want to disappear.
restraining orders don't work for someone like me who is too soft and vulnerable .......I don't get hit, I've been yelled at by the police by ' wasting their time.

thanks,
Ps love the message you gave on welcome Wednesday

[Troubled_One]

hey anne, sorry i did not reply to one of your last messages, you asked how i was doing,

i am doing ok.

but at the moment i have a real quiver in my throat, like i am about to stop breathing at times. i think it is the depression and anxiety that i can not escape, and stress panic etc.

I am trying to deal with it. I could go on more but not today i guess.

* more on to you

i understand about your situation. you do not know how to say go away to your boyfriend or ex boyfriend. i see that it is hard to be vulnerable to this because if you do say go away he may come back and you do not want to take that risk.

maybe you need to stand up to him once and for all and say go away and mean it. it may take a big effort on your part but it sounds like the effort you are putting in already is doing you and everyone around you damage.

it may be corageous but maybe thats what you need to do?

and understand you do not need that person in your life any more.

take care. lee.